Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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