So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
