with your own penis?
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize