is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
third nipple confirmed
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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