; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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