i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
