Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
