Your tits are I can't wait for
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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