I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
