Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
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