its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize
