i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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