Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Randomize
