Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
