I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
