theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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