just tell him i said nine months
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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