my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
