i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
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