Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
