Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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