I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
i just made my gag reflex go away.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize