i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I love you. Go after that dick
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
