when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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