Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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