dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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