I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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