Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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