My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
