what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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