the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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