so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Bring me that man meat
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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