if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
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