Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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