Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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