Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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