I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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