Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
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