Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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