ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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