I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
