great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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