How'd it feel making her break her religion?
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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