I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
