they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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