dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
She even gives head with a lisp.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
She told me I should be a condom model.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize