Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
My day in three words: secret purse cake
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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