Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Houston, we have a blender
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Randomize
