I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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