At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize